Friday, March 28, 2014

Book Review: Dexter's Final Cut by Jeff Lindsay

     I was super excited to see Jeff Lindsay had written another Dexter book. When it finally came in to the library, I read through it in less than a week. I have only one emotion regarding this book now.



     What…what just happened? Seriously, did Jeff Lindsay finally have a mental breakdown?

     I really don’t know how to describe the book without being spoileriffic, so I’m going to be spoileriffic.

     We start out with Dexter being his usual snarky self, dealing with Rita’s half-finished sentences, Astor’s Preteen Raeg, and Cody’s just there with his neatly beheaded action figures. All seems set up for another fantastic and quirky run through Dexter’s mind.

     Then a film crew shows up to shadow the Miami PD for their cop show set in Miami. For some bizarre reason, Dexter and Debs are the ones chosen to do this, just as murdered and mutilated women start popping up around the area. Okay, so Dexter has a hanger-on to deal with along with finding the murderer. We can do this.

     Then a pretty actress shows up, so Dexter snatches the Idiot Ball from the police department and refuses to let go of it for the rest of the story. The Dark Passenger, presumably overwhelmed by the weight of the Idiot Ball, goes silent for almost the entire book and appears to just give up by the end. Even demonic entities think it’s all getting quite silly.

     To sum it up, Dexter starts falling in love-ish with the actress which makes him do very stupid things and miss very very obvious things, and by the end he can’t figure a way out of the huge mess that’s been made and we leave him and Astor sitting and waiting for the police to arrive and possibly arrest Dexter for several murders he didn’t commit. Cody is never mentioned, so I’m guessing he packed up his beheaded figurines and took off wherever the Dark Passenger went.

     This was a deeply disappointing possible ending. There was always the implication that Dexter might finally be caught one day; but there was also the implication that he might have gone on quite happily to the end of his days, violently cleaning up the streets of Miami. Furthermore, everyone acted so incredibly out of character that these people were hardly recognizable. The only explanation that possibly makes sense to me is that Jeff Lindsay was so disgusted with how the TV series progressed that he wrote a book deconstructing everything they did. (I mean, the premise was the filming of a cop show in Miami, with the main characters being a tough lady cop and her bloodwork sidekick.)

          Ah, well. I guess it could be worse. I mean, what’s the weirdest possible ending for Dexter? He becomes a lumberjack or someth—

A thousand Monty Python jokes immediately spawned into being.



CURSES.

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